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Hello
Moms! My name is Kellie Coombs and I
live in chaotic No.Va. Yes, for those of
you who’ve spent time in So.Cal, the traffic is worse in No.Va. As an army wife of 23 years, now retired,
I’ve lived and traveled all over the US and Europe. The one major city I won’t learn to drive in
is: DC! That’s my hubby’s job. My husband John and I have been married for
26 years and now have 5 children. Lyndsay
married our new son, Christopher in March, Adam, Emily and Jesse or as we call
him: Jman. The children range in age
from 27 to 13 and have all been mostly homeschooled from the beginning. I should add that I’m originally from
Illinois, raised in Kankakee County, and traveled the 55 down south often to
visit family members. My father is from
Woodriver and went to Woodriver High School.
If the school still has the pictures of graduating classes lining the
hall ways, you’ll find my grandmother, father, 3 uncles and an aunt on those
walls. If you are a member of the Tweedy,
St. Peters, Gray or Anderson families:
We are probably related. I’d love
to speak with you later.
During my time in Texas in the late 90s, I
heard about this homeschooling mama who would be speaking at a Conference in
Arlington, TX. I packed up, grabbed a
girlfriend and off we went. At that
conference our sweet Sally spoke on Seasons of a Mother’s Heart. The theme of the book and the message that
has stuck in my soul for the last 20 years is this:
“The
more I study the Bible, though, the more I also am reminded of what it is I
really need as a homeschooling mother (for my purpose today I’ll substitute
Vessel for Christ)- The ministry of the Holy Spirit, the power of prayer, the
provision of grace, and the life of faith.
When I need encouragement to persevere, I need the light of God’s truth
shining on the shadowy places in my heart.
I need the gentle admonition of the Holy Spirit to run the race with
endurance. I need to be transformed by
the renewing of my mind with God’s purpose for mothers, fathers, and
children.”
During
the last 20 years Sally and I first became email friends and shortly after, she
became my mentor. She has become our
Titus 2 woman, encouraging and teaching others in God’s word and applying it to
the every day life of a mother in the mundane.
If Sally has said it once, she’s said a thousand times to us corporately
and individually:
1. Wise women copy Wise
women.
2. And 2ndly: In the absence of Biblical Conviction, people
will go the way of culture.
Becoming
a Titus 2 woman and willing Vessel to be poured out for His purposes hasn’t
been easy. As soon as I felt I’d
mastered one part of Christian mothering, there would be a void found in
another place.
But
I was a willing vessel….When I first heard Sally say at a conference : I wanna be your girl, Lord! Use me!
I thought I’d found my Kindred Spirit for the rest of my life! How many of you are encourage today to hear
that I Wanna Be YOUR GIRL, LORD! Use me! Use me to the next generation of mamas, help
me to walk in Truth and to teach others!
Walking
in Truth comes with every mamas’ favorite Word:
Pruning!:
John
15: 1-6 I am the true vine and my Father
in the vine dresser. Every branch in Me
that does not bear fruit, he takes away and every branch that bears fruit, he
prunes it so that it may bear more fruit……..abide in me and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit of itself
unless it abides in the vine, so neither can you unless you abide in me. I am the vine, you are the branches, if you
remain in me and I in you, you will bear my fruit: apart from Me you can do nothing. If you do not remain in me you are like a
branch that’s thrown away and withers.
Such branches are picked up, thrown into the fire and burned.
Staying
connected to the vine, accepting and responding to the pruning the Vinedresser
bestows on us is a part of becoming a willing vessel. I want to take the remainder of our time
today and chat with you about lessons I’ve learned and the way the Spirit and
Word have shined on those Shadowy Places of my heart, how He’s pruned me to
yield more fruit and become the willing Vessel and Branch to be used
today.
To
stay Filled Up, we must stay connected.
Paul
writes in 2nd Timothy 2:20-21 (paraphrased) that like the many
vessels in a large house, we are to be “vessels for honor, sanctified, and
useful to the Master, prepared for every good work.” The purpose of a vessel is
two-fold. First, to receive and preserve
what the Master places in it, and second, to pour out its contents at the
proper time to according to the Master’s need.
As
vessels, we must be prepared for the good work our Master intends for us. There are four principals regarding being
filled properly and pouring effectively that we must be mindful of:
1) We must be filled with the Word
of God
2) We must be filled through Prayer
3) We must know our Vessel
4) We must be prepared to Pour
Filled with His Word.
About
six years ago my family and I found ourselves facing tremendous hardship. The circumstances left me sitting in my chair
for most of the day, each day, for about a year. I was stunned into silence. I knew at the
time as I do now, the Old Testament and Gospels repeat that “a bruised reed He
shall not break and a dimly lit candle he shall not quench.” Because I had a Testimony until that time of
not being broken yet, I was able to respond albeit with tears and heartache the
same words Mary used to respond to the angel’s news of a baby that would Save the
World. Her Magnificat: Oh my Soul Does magnify the Lord and my
spirit does rejoice in God my Savior.
The pruning happened, it was harsh and painful. What I’d been filled with to that point was
the connection that held me and our family to the Vine, yielded to the
Vinedresser. That year in my chair led me straight into
God’s Word. I devoured it. I sunk deep into the Vine. I longed to know Christ, His Father, and the
Spirit better than I ever had before.
Circumstances were grim, and experience thus far had taught me to choose
Him and His ways if I didn’t want to respond in harshness like the world. I had to choose to be a vessel filled with
His Word rather than filled with a spirit of bitterness.
During
this time, a girlfriend invited me to her Precept Bible Study. Solid teaching
with grounded women, time to study each day and be filled with His word and
pray together. What an answer to prayer this was! It
took about a year, but it was needed time with the Lord and I slowly got out of
my chair and was able to stand again! See, as His Word instructs us, receive
the pruning to yield more fruit. I was
beginning to shoot forth a few tender inches from my pruning point and healing
was taking place. Since that time, I’m a huge believer in Precept Bible Studies. It
was just the thing I needed at the time.
Whether it is Precept Bible Studies, Bible Study Fellowship, a small
group at your church, your home, or in your neighborhood, a daily Bible study with
accountability is a key component in staying filled.
Filled Through Prayer.
When
I was finally able to pull myself out of my chair, I put on a pair of walking
shoes and got outside. During this time,
a couple of girlfriends were walking their own hardships. One very smart friend asked if we could all
use a distraction. Boy Did we! Now, I’d been a big walker in the past,
enjoying beauty and creation, but this was different. There were serious, life changing issues at
hand that we three girls were dealing with.
We needed Jesus to show up big, or we were going to get in our own way
and fill our vessels with bitterness and resentment. So, we fought the binge
desires and took to the streets of our neighborhoods intent on taking 10,000
steps a day. During these walks I was
able to line up my circumstances with God’s Word. The beauty of His Word
captivated me and my own very real, painful struggles began to heal, step after
step, prayer after prayer. I learned to speak
back God’s Word to Him. We can be filled
with attitudes that say, “It’s all a mystery to me, this Bible, I’ll never
understand it, why try?” “Nothing
changes, I tried to pray every day for a week, nothing happened!”
I
was not just building physical muscles and endurance as I walked and prayed … I
was building spiritual muscles and endurance as well! I spoke back to God his Word that I was
learning from Bible study. Ask Him to
help you understand the Why and How of Scripture. Why did Ezekiel have to lie on his side? Were the exiles really able to understand the
affliction Ezekiel’s actions were to reveal to them? Why did ravens feed Elijah? Really, Lord, You wanted even Ahab to be saved? You pursued Ahab? What must that mean you think of me? Desire for me? The affliction that we are
enduring at this time must be understood by You, Lord! You sought after Ahab, as the book of Kings
tells us and because I’m grafted into you by the death of Your Son, You pursue
this bruised reed to tend to it as well!
See the transformation
ladies? From broken to comforted, I was
able, by the power of the Holy Spirit, to view my circumstances from His
perspective. As I filled my vessel with His
Word and prayer there was less room for self pity and bitterness. Walking out my prayers, in view of His
Creation where God is in full view! Deep
greens of trees, blooming flowers and bushes, the smell on honey suckle on a
country road filled my Vessel. These
long nature walks of prayer and beauty yielded great compassion for others in
my life and I look back on those days with a heart of gratitude and
thanks.
Know Your Vessel.
Back
in Thessalonians Paul says we’re each different vessels, made of different
materials for different purposes. ’ We
must know What Message God has Given Each of Us to Proclaim His Goodness to
this world.
My
Message is One of Encouragement! Romans
12:8
if
it is to encourage, then give encouragement;
I
am by nature an encourager. But, as in
all things, there can be a right way and a wrong way to get across our
messages.
Over
the years, I’ve learned more and more about myself. Using a great tool called the Myers-Briggs
personality test. Isabel Myers and her
mother Katherine Briggs believed that understanding your personality type can
help you appreciate your own strengths, gifts, and needs, and help you
understand and appreciate others’ differences.
Who
are YOU? How do you tick? As the prophet Isaiah says in chapter
64: We are all the work of the Hands of
the Potter.
How
were you shaped in your Mother’s womb for His Glory? Extravert / Introvert? Artist or Excel spread sheet wizard? Are you a deep thinker or a deep feeler? Intuition or just ‘get a sense’ kind of
gal? I’ve taken two separate
Myers-Briggs assessments, and they both nailed me to a T.
I
am a strong ENFJ: I’m an otter, an
encourager, list maker and checker-offer, feeler of great and deep things. If you need empathy, I’m your girl. I walk mile upon mile each week and jog and
jog speaking to the Lord and in my head to so many women. I have thousands of blogs that have never
been written, but boy they have been prayed over and talked out on my
walks. The encourager in me must be
encouraging myself to keep going. ENFJs represent about 3% of the
population.
Myers
Briggs helps you understand yourself.
Why do you become angry, upset, happy, joyful at various
experiences? Understanding yourself is a
key to figuring out how to stay filled. Consider
taking the test at Truity.com
When
we know who we are we can meet our personal needs a bit better. God has used some powerful situations in my
life to get my extraverted self to stop and sit and listen. As I just said, my Personality is just 3% of
the population. So, let’s get real for a
minute: How hard do you think the Lord
has to work to get me to listen? As a 3%
kind of gal, there have been some 3% kind of ways He’s used to get me to SIT
STILL! I’ve learned that in order to
keep from trying to fix every situation, I’ve needed to sit still, be quiet and
speak to Him first before acting. Exercise,
taking in His Beauty: nature, chocolate, hot tea, flowers, scented candles,
classical music all fill me and center my soul on Him. Not surprisingly, Myers-Briggs and Truity.com
identify these as actions as necessary and important for ENFJs.
Knowing
yourself also helps you to know how you might become too easily drained. ENFJs can become too involved in other's
problems, and place too much trust in them. We are vulnerable to another snare as well: we
have a tremendous capacity for reflecting on and analyzing our own feelings,
but we can overanalyze, and try to fix something in ourselves that isn't necessarily
wrong. When this happens, it's important
for ENFJs to pull back and use self-reflection to distinguish between what we
really feel, and what is a separate issue that needs to be looked at from
another perspective.
The
Power of the Holy Spirit, shining on those Shadowy Places of our Hearts, Grace:
gently reaching down, dusting us off and sanding off some rough edges offers us
plenty of opportunity to dig deep and get to know ourselves and submit to
Him. My Vessel is still such a work of
Grace in this area. I can still
constantly beat myself up if I don’t take time to be filled by the Potter and
Accept the Vinedressers’ pruning.
Prepared to Pour.
When
you are filled with His Word and prayer, and understand your strengths and weak
spots as a unique creation, you are better able to understand what work the
Father has prepared for you. And to then do that work.
Moms,
if we work within the use of our vessels we will stay full longer. Most of my comments to my children start like
this:
HEY! YOU KNOW WHAT? We should go to the store and make up a box
for that mom that’s hurting, remember, she just found out some tough
circumstances, let’s go encourage her!
Or
something like this: You know, when
Chris and Lyndsay move to Colorado, let’s make them a care package to land in
their mailbox just as they are arriving after their cross country trip.
As
I spend time encouraging others, I find that my vessel isn’t poured out as
fast. It’s natural for me to want to
Strengthen the Brethren! I’m satisfied
by the work I’m doing staying in my gifting.
But
what about your vessel? Where and how
should you pour?
Romans
12 is a great chapter to spend some time praying through on your walks and in
your Bible Study time.
12 Therefore,
I urge you, brothers and sisters, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies
as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God—this is your true and proper
worship. 2 Do
not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of
your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his
good, pleasing and perfect will.
Humble Service in the Body of
Christ
3 For
by the grace given me I say to every one of you: Do not think of yourself more
highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgment, in
accordance with the faith God has distributed to each of you. 4 For just as
each of us has one body with many members, and these members do not all have
the same function, 5 so
in Christ we, though many, form one body, and each member belongs to all the
others. 6 We
have different gifts, according to the grace given to each of us. If your gift
is prophesying, then prophesy in accordance with your[a] faith; 7 if it is
serving, then serve; if it is teaching, then teach; 8 if it is to
encourage, then give encouragement; if it is giving, then give generously; if
it is to lead,[b]
do it diligently; if it is to show mercy, do it cheerfully.
Are
you a Servant? A Teacher? If so, your unique vessels will need to be
used for those purposes the Master has planned to use you for.
I
love these verses in Romans, Paul makes it clear that the Body is made up of
many members. We all need each other in order
to be effective for the Kingdom.
I’m
horrible at Thinking, I mean, I just am!
Putting together this cohesive talk for the Lord is really stretching my
gifting. It would be so much easier for
me if I could just put my walking shoes on and starting talking to us while I’m
walking. As I said above, talks and
blogs and prayers flow so naturally for me when I’m walking. Yet, I must take the time to think ahead, ask
for help from those other vessels, such as my husband, who are so much better
at putting messages in some sort of understandable format! I’m in need of keeping deep thinkers around
me.
I’m
also horrible at keeping track of my expenses, but you know what? I find that I can’t pour out if I’m
struggling about how much money I’m spending.
This summer a girlfriend volunteered to come help me install and set up
Quicken. Lisa patiently sat with me side
by side at my computer and talked me through what reconciling was and how to go
about it each month. She patted my back
as my head hung when I began to run reports of my spending. I don’t know how she does it, but she’s so
non invasive when she says , “ You can
do this and you are doing this. Now get a real budget set up!”
Don’t
be afraid to ask for help from the Members of the Body if you need help in an
area! It’ll help you stay filled
longer.
If
my Message is Encouragement then my Vessel must be used to encourage. Starting my own Mom Heart Group 4 years ago
has been a blessing. Our meeting
together once a month, in the beginning it was more frequent…… has built
relationships, accountability, prayer partners and we have Strengthened the
Brethren as Jesus asked Peter to do! Then,
just through choosing the pruning the Vinedresser assigned for us as just the
right moment for His Purposes more Miracles begin to take place: The women around you grow! I remain astounded at the women in my Mom
Heart Group who have stepped out in Faith and started their own groups, Bible
studies, cooking groups and are reaching out to love on more and more moms that
I can’t possibly reach.
Once
again, His Ways astound me! As we build up the Kingdom in our midst, the
powerful begins to take shape. WE leave
and He enters and fills us. Our
circumstances are changed into opportunities for Growth and Filling. What an All Knowing Savior we Serve! Our family had a decision to make 6 years
ago. I had a decision to make. Would we stay filled for Kingdom use or give
up and go the way of the World? We clung
to our Vinedresser! We chose like Job
did, ‘Tho He Slay me, Yet, will I trust Him!”
Looking back, I’m so glad we did.
It’s brought Joy and Contentment and Compassion beyond what we could
comprehend!
Mamas! Work in your Strengths, asking the Father to reveal
the work He has for you. Maybe you do
need to build muscle in an area for a time.
Maybe you need a season of rest.
Remember, The minute we begin to do things in our own strength, we are
bound to fail. His mercies are new every
morning and His grace is sufficient to carry us for that day. Then we need Him again the next day and the
next. Seek Him first. Ask Him the tough questions about your
circumstances, His shoulders are big enough to handle it. Then take the time to stop and listen. Stay connected to who you are, Stay in His
Word, create fellowship around you, seek out beauty in His Creation to
transform you and drink Him In.
During
that year I spent in my chair, it became my prayer closet. I kept candles and flowers close by so I
could keep my early mornings filled with the beauty He created as I sought
Him. When we seek Him, His Ways and His
Word, expectations and personal desires begin to fade. We pour out the resentment and hurt and are
filled up with Him, His compassion and caring.
We are then vessels used for our proper place in His Kingdom.
Like
the water jars at the wedding of Cana, through the transforming power of
Christ, His Ways and His Word, we can pour out tasty fruit into the lives of
others for His Glory.
Thank
you.
